Crapple Finally Being Taken To The Woodshed

After years of relentless growth, Apple is finally coming to understand that hocking $1400 handsets containing only modest improvements over their $800 predecessors is not a winning business model for the long haul. Blame the trade war, cost of inputs/labor, patent disputes, etc., all you want but Apple’s precipitous decline has nothing to do with any of the aforementioned and everything to do with tapped out consumers suffering from Apple Sticker Shock and dismayed by Cook’s failure to offer more than animated emojis and a marginally better camera. Goodbye $1T, hello $850B! Don’t shed too many tears for Mr. Cook, tho. Apple can lean on its legions of brainwashed junkies to re-propel itself to its coveted $1T market capitalization.

Apple’s next iteration of the iPhone will rely heavily on 5G connectivity gimmickry and the addition of 3D poop emojis should catapult Apple back to where it belongs: top of the tech heap. It’s hard to imagine where highly indebted Americans scrape together the $1200 for the latest gen phone but one can safely assume if monthly installments were removed from the landscape, iPhone sales would be even more abysmal. The fact is, Apple products are not inferior to other handset makers but their prices, across the board – on the whole family of Apple products, are exorbitant, to say the least. For the price of a typical lower-end Apple laptop, I can build my own desktop PC whose computing power runs circles around everything but Apple’s very highest end computers bedecked with 32GB of RAM and lightning fast processors.

I’m not particularly enamored with laptops and haven’t been for quite some time. My love affair with them ended shortly after I broke an HP, Windows ME-powered laptop in half over my knee. Apple laptops are probably superior to other laptops in many respects except the most important: sheer computing power. And they lag well behind a good old-fashion desktop build any day of the week. Point is, people are awestruck by the power of that silvery apple icon and can be talked into almost any purchase so long as it bore that precious stamp of social acceptance and approval. Apple share price will likely vault higher in the shorter term, but as US and international households find themselves increasingly leveraged, luxuries like a $1450 iPhone XS Max are demoted from “must have” to “we’ll see”.

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